“May your tent be infested with camel leaches!”
—Jim (my dad)
December 2009
Tumblr.com '09: What I've learned.
1. This is the best site that I have ever spent a part of my life on.
2. There are actual bloggers on this website. But shh, they’re supposed to be a secret.
3. Photos get more reblogs and likes than Text posts. Forever.
4. When you reblog, saying “THIS.” and “Oh My God” are two appropriate responses.
5. Tumblarity is a fickle whore that will let you fuck her good, but won’t let you get a nut.
6. LOLCats make the world a better place.
7. Using the Greater than sign > Not using the Greater than sign.
8. “I’m crying, I’m dying, rotflmfaoooooooo.”
9. Tumblr has no private messaging system, but AIM/YIM/MSN is a good substitute.
10. You must have a degree in grammar to post on Tumblr or else people will not take you seriously at all.
11. If it exists, it has a FuckYeah.
12. We all live in the 90’s and we blame time for changing that.
13. “Post in my Formspring so you can be all anonymous and say dirty things even though I know you on Tumblr but I don’t know who you are.”
14. We hate hipsters. …wait, what is a hipster?
15. Being gay is cool and acceptable, but if you don’t agree 100% with this, you are the reincarnation of Hitler. Just so you know.
16. “FFFFFUUUUU” is an emotion.
17. The original 151 Pokemon will always be better than the rest of the other Pokemon in our minds.
18. You can talk to the coolest, most down to earth, most amazing people ever here. The only thing is that they’re like 400 miles away from you.
19. “You will never be a quality poster.”
20. You should never say you hate your mom and dad! They gav u lif!!!
21. TheDailyWhat is to Tumblr like CNN is to real life.
22. You can find yourself by actually blogging your hopes, dreams, ambitions, and fears. …but if it’s too long, no one will ever know.
23. Nutella is life.
24. Reblog if this is an oversaturated cliché.
25. Tumblr is the 16th page of /b/. It’s the pet semetary for memes.
26. Miley Cyrus is a slut because… she just is ok?
27. The Chat button is the most useless feature ever, until you get a AIM account and people to talk to.
28. “I have [insert food here]! OM NOM NOM!!!”
29. My Life Is Average puts a magical aspect in Tumblr.
30. Wyoming never did, and never will exist in this spectral plane.
31. If you need an album, Tumblr always comes through
32. People like people that STFU and post pretty pictures.
33. Less Tumblarity = More of a real life.
34. More Tumblarity = Bitch, don’t hate me because post things and people like them.
35. Yoshi from Mario was a girl.
36. It is a law in the internet that when people refresh Tumblr around their parents, porn shows up.
37. Bulbasaur was never cool.
38. When you read it, you’ll shit brix.
39. People will take beautifully written creepypasta stories as actual fact.
40. If you have sunglasses on, and we can see your top teeth, we will reblog and say “DAT ASS.”
41. You will never sleep upon entering this site.
42. There was never a log out button, you just press X.
43. Pedobear is our mascot.
44. *Kanye shrug*
45. Dashboard Coincidences are made of the tears of some divine figure.
46. Pokemon is SRS BSNS.
47. Memes never get old here because they’ve died and Tumblr is heaven and hell at the same time.
48. TyPiiiNq LyK DiiS WiiLl GeT YuU UnFoLLoWeD QuiiK.
49. Search your name on Tumblr, see who reblogged and talked about you.
50. Despite what anyone says, this is a good website with good people, and I’m lucky to spend my time here. Almost all of you are amazing and I would love to spend at least one day in real life with you all.
Thank you.
captain-mongoose:robinpicart:abrandnewchapter:schoolboycrush:spacemaninlove:haroldfloren:littlemissdorkette:dearmary:(via solaravada)
just realized that Motion City Soundtrack released another track from their upcoming album. I am extremely relieved to report that it is much much better than the first track that was released. It actually sounds like the same band! :D
I am now officially excited for the album once again.
January 19 can’t come fast enough!
>:(
why does nothing I say matter?
Play
I want FOOD.
Play
Play
nothin like some merry christmas puke. I want a fucking cheeseburger.
awkward family get together is awkward.
fuck you Microsoft. fuck you, fuck you, fuck you. I fucking hate that you’re getting away with charging almost $100 for a fucking wifi adapter. that is so bullshit I can’t even stand it. I’ve always hated you.
sometimes, I wish I could be a girl so that if I did dirty things, it would be sexy instead if perverted.